A fresh start

Well, if you notice I'm always giving myself fresh starts, I must admit apologetically that it is true. But I hope it is not of any consequence and have not become a habit. Last week, I stopped trading altogether (which I realised, today, wasn't entirely true). Well, I didn't trade in my dreams, or sleep-trade (cf. sleepwalk), but I did make the same old mistake again. The profitable one. This time it is EUR/USD. Longed the pair on the 21st of February, set the SL and forgot all about it. Today I've closed the trade at a positive 350 pips. A nice gain, but again, a mistake that shouldn't have been committed in the first place.

But maybe I should tell you guys a little about why I took a break. Well, the simple and apparent reason is to focus on my academic obligations. I have a backlog of 6 weeks' worth of material to review and integrate into my being before my tests within the next 2 weeks. I've had many thoughts and, as undisciplined as I am, many other non-academic activities along the way.

BUT the reason isn't that simple. I stopped trading because for 2 straight weeks, and on two weekly meetings with Kelvin and Firman, I reported losses. None of my trades went right. And the reason? Because I confused the two systems, PIPS and TNT. (taught by my mentor)

Also, Miranda, my girlfriend, awakened me to my low sense of commitment and urgency towards learning and ultimately professionally trading Forex. I have no doubt I can only see forex trading as my way out of this rut - this situation of (relative) poverty and non-self-sufficiency. And as aware as she was, I knew I was committing enough to my cause. I traded infrequently, and often not adopting any proper system. The tragedy occurs - I fail time and again to keep a demo account afloat. Then the irony sets in, for I repeatedly advice people to trade by a strict system, for it helps not only personal accountability but also in tracking the reliability and efficiency of any system.

I decided to start again. But with what but a bad load of trades and loads of ill-discipline on my hands? Well...remember the extra-academic activities I did? Part of that was thinking. In part an angry response to an event, I thought long and hard about idealism. That is too much of a word to encapsulate the essence. I should say "dreams". And I went wondering, why do people set goals way beyond themselves, when the aims are remotely possible or maybe totally impossible? I watched The Last Samurai two times and tried to figure what is the value of a romantic ideal of self-sacrifice and directing all of one's energy and time to perfect one single task. Why aim for the moon? Why try to be perfect?

Motivation. That's the answer I got. How possible would becoming rich be if one never starts to think it possible for him/herself? The fact is, romantic and far-fetched ideals attract us. The ideas of saintliness, holiness, compassion, power, riches (in all its perfections) are inclinations within us.

So I uncover another layer of meaning and significance behind the mental practices as advised by Napolean Hill in Think and Grow Rich.

My Plan

I shall build my forex trading and training program in steps. The first is my basic code of conduct, the rules I shall trade by regardless of the system I choose to adopt in future.
(I think I'll talk more about them later this week)

The intermediate step is to implement the two trading systems - PIPS and TNT separately. For that purpose, I've totally segregated the indicators onto 2 different charts.

My immediate concern is twofold. One, to design the excel sheet to properly account for, and later analyse, my trades. Two, to trade both systems on 4hour charts.

My ultimate goal: TO GO 'LIVE' BY THE END OF JUNE.

I hope it is not too late then.